James Joyce is Overrated

Okay, so famous Irish author James Joyce is on every Great Books list ever published. Ulysses, Finnegan's Wake, Portrait of the Artist as A Young Man...they're all praised and renowned, and on college reading lists for the educated student, and all this other shit.

Here's the thing though: James Joyce SUCKS.

Okay, okay, I'm being a little harsh. The man was definitely intelligent, and definitely talented. I will not deny that his books are well-written...but does anyone actually know what he's writing about? Can anyone actually focus on his stream-of-consciousness style for more than a hot second? Does anybody else get constantly lost in his wordy metaphors? I know I do.

I read Portrait of the Artist as A Young Man my senior year, when I was going through my "read-every-book-on-the-AP-reading-list" stage. Many of those books were excellent, but I was sincerely disappointed with Mr. Joyce. I was intrigued for the first couple of chapters, but by the middle of the book, I was lost and confused. I have to be honest, I don't think I was completely focused on the content after that point, because I was just trying to find a point where we'd actually get back to an understandable plot...but that never happened. Oh, except for the part where he got addicted to having sex with prostitutes. THAT part was made nice and clear.

I do like his letters to his wife, though. They're so scatological. I personally am not into that shit (haha), but I think it's funny that such a renowned author WAS.

So anyways, next time I'll write on an author who is actually really incredible. There's quite a few of those, so it may take me a while to focus on one, but I'll do my best. In the meantime, what does everyone else think of James Joyce? I feel so silly asking questions when no one answers, but I KNOW people are reading this, so please leave a comment!

Cheers,
GIM<3

Pointless Blathering (on Aliens)

Whenever we envision aliens, we imagine them to be races far more intelligent and advanced than our own. But this isn't necessarily true. If there is life out there, which I believe there is, by the way...there will be a ranging variety of it. On some planets, life will just be developing out of the primordial ooze. On others, there will be very highly advanced civilizations. But the odds are that there will be plenty of alien species that are right around our level of development. If we somehow discover each other, we will, of course, still learn so much from our encounter. But they won't necessarily be so far ahead of us in technological development.

Also, everyone is sooo paranoid that, if they exist, aliens are out to conquer/slaughter us. Honestly, I can't think of any good reason that they would do that. No alien race is going to want to take over the Earth. We don't have enough resources, we've already used so many for ourselves, plus our environment is too fucked up. So there's that theory out the window. Also, no alien race is just going to destroy the Earth, either. What could they possibly gain by doing that? I mean, even if we did have the technology, we would not go around destroying other planets for shits and giggles, it would be so wasteful. Now, they might want to abduct a few of us, maybe even enslave us, but I also think that the chances of that are slim. I honestly think that if any real contact is ever made between us and another planet, it will be solely to communicate and to learn about each other, as opposed to either party immediately wanting to take advantage of the other...although it may well evolve into that.

So yeah, those are my thoughts. I'm just pondering as I watch the History Channel series Ancient Aliens. It's suggesting that ancient civilizations were highly impacted by astronauts from outer space, blahblahblah, nothing I haven't heard before. But it's certainly interesting, and thought-provoking. I could definitely believe it. Thoughts?

Cheers,
GIM<3

THAT'S How Bad It Is.

You know you're upset when Lady Gaga's new album has just come out and you have literally NO desire to listen to any of the songs.

Cheers (I guess),
GIM<3

Words of the Day IV

GOOD WORD
keffiyeh - an Arab headdress consisting of a square of cloth folded to form a triangle and held on by a cord

BAD WORD
plotz - to be overcome with emotion; give way to excitement, anger, delight, etc.

Hatred Rant, Love Rhapsody

You know what I hate? Overuse of the term "lol". Actually, I hate just ANY use of that term. I mean, I really don't want to see it unless I know for sure that you are LEGITIMATELY laughing out loud. And the thing is, people use "lol" so often, that there's literally no way humanly possible that they are laughing out loud every time they write it. People are always like "hey lol" and I'm like "...what...what the fuck are you laughing at??" Now, I have to say that I talk to quite a few people who use "lol" who are genuinely good people...they should just refrain from using this absolutely insipid internet term.

You know what I love? Being up this early in the morning for no apparent reason. I mean, yeah, I'm upset that I couldn't fall asleep, that kinda sucks. But I like being the only one up, and I love the early morning. Usually I sleep right through it, sooo it's kind of entertaining. I like when everyone else starts getting up and there's coffee and whatnot. It's just a good time.

Cheers,
GIM<3

Antic Disposition

So here's something I literally JUST realized: I get really crazy about guys (this is the moment where my friends all think, "Really, Gron, ya JUST realized this?")

Seriously, though, I was thinking about all the guys I've liked in the past couple of years, and with literally all of them, I get a little twitchy. Even the guys that I only have tiny, short crushes on, I'll have these elaborate fantasies where we have this like tortured, ongoing romance, or that we have an illegitimate child together, or we just end up living happily after forever and ever or some shit like that. And I won't even venture into what I do with guys I REALLY like, it borders on the truly obscene.

Example: there have been three guys in my life that I've really, really, really liked. With each one of those guys, I was like, "OH MY GOD. THIS IS IT. I'M IN LOVE. HE'S THE ONE. HE'S PERFECT. I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM ZOMGZOMGZLAJSDLFAJD" And this was BEFORE I had any inkling of whether they had any affection for ME or not. Of course, none of them did, but before I realized that, I would put myself through absolute fucking torment trying to figure out if they had any feelings for me. "Well, on Monday he looked really happy to see me and hugged me for like a whole five seconds, which could totally mean something, and also when we were sitting next to each other his thigh was like pressing into mine, but was that because he was signalling to me that he likes me or was it because there were seven of us on one couch? And then I texted him Friday and he didn't text me back for like a whole three hours and thirty-seven minutes, and if he really liked me he SO would've texted me back like immediately, right?"

Gross. GROSS. Believe me, I know, it is gross. And I am usually the champion for non-grossness in love and relationships.

So, now that I have this information about myself, what do I do with it? Well, first, I look back at every single guy I ever liked and bemoan the fact that I a) made such a fool out of myself in front of them and my friends, and b) I put sooo much time and effort into guys that probably never gave me a second thought. But after that's done, I guess I just have to keep this information tucked away until the next time I find myself falling for someone. When I find myself mooning over him, or overanalyzing, or wanting to tear my hair out in frustration over a guy I've known for a hot second, I'll just have to remember that I've done this a million times before, and nothing good has come of it! If I keep my cool and act like the genuinely decent person I know (think) myself to be, I have much more of a chance of ending up with this guy...or at least getting on his dick, which is just as good, really.

Thankfully, I have no love interest at the moment, and I don't think one will be cropping up any time soon. So I have plenty of time to try and cool my lovesick, starry-eyed, crazy-ass heels.

Cheers,
GIM<3

Growing Up

I don't want to grow up. But I have to.

I have to go back to school. In addition to the CUNY schools I mentioned in an earlier post, I'm now applying to Columbia University School of General Studies, Marymount Manhattan, and St. Joseph's College Brooklyn. Seven schools. Ugh. I also have to do my taxes for the first time (!) and fill out my FAFSA (!!!) Kill me.

I have to move out of Woodstock...and, after a temporary stint with my mother whilst I find a job and an apartment, move out on my own. Living on my own isn't terrifying for me, it's what that entails. Paying rent and bills? Scary shit, yo. And also finding a job (or two, or three) that can support me enough, WHILE going to school??

How do grown-ups do it?

Cheers,
GIM<3